All things are possible, nevertheless...

After I finished updating this blog yesterday, I received a phone call from Jen-- Samuel was scheduled again for surgery at 1pm. Apparently, the radiologist determined there was a blockage that needed to be removed. So, back to Indianapolis I drove, in time to hold our little boy for about five minutes before he was rushed off to surgery.

At about 4pm, the surgeon came to our room and informed us that his surgery went very well, and that there were no complications. Amazingly, they were able to do the procedure through about a 1 to 2 inch incision. The surgeon estimated that Samuel would be in the NICU for about three weeks, or until he showed all the signs of a healthy newborn i.e., gaining weight, normal digestion/breathing.

Today, he was taken off of the ventilator, as the anesthesia is finally wearing off. And he is beginning to make noises and twitch around again. Hopefully, we'll get to hold him soon and spend some quality time with our "little sir."

Jen is also doing very well. She is now moving around with some slight pain and should be out of the hospital sometime tomorrow. Please continue to pray for their recovery.

Through all of this, God has been showing me some things about myself, as well as about Himself:

1. All things are possible with God-- this was a theme that kept jumping out of the Bible as we were studying this week. On Monday morning, before we left for the hospital, we read through Mark chapters 9 & 10. Mark 9:23 & 10:27 seemed to jump out. We were reminded that with God, and for the one who believes, all things are possible. This gave us both hope that perhaps, God was going to supernaturally intervene and make this all go away. But it didn't go away.

Could God have intervened and outright healed our son? Yes. But that was not His plan.

2. All things are possible with God... according to His will. Over the course of this past week, many prayers went up to the Lord about Samuel and Jen. There were many pleadings to God to heal without surgery. I even cited examples in the Bible, as if I needed to remind God of His words and power to act on our behalf.

Again, could God have intervened and outright healed our son without surgery or doctors? Are all things possible for God? Could this all have been avoided? Yes. Yes. Yes. But no.

It wasn't until after Samuel's surgery and after reading Mark 14 that God gently gave me His perspective. Before he was betrayed, Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane. And three times he reasoned with God: "Abba, Father, all things are possible for You. Take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not what I will, but what You will."

Jesus recognized and knew that all things are possible for God. But He also knew what the will of the Father was in advance and ultimately submitted to it; He knew that the Scriptures had to be fulfilled. He expressed His humanity in telling God that He preferred not to face the cross, but He also modeled a right relationship with God; He knew God well enough to know what God could do as well as what God wanted to do and still committed Himself to the Lord.

I was challenged. I know that "all things are possible with God." But I wasn't close enough to Him to know His will and submit to it. Instead, I had insisted, pleaded and reasoned with God to move in a direction I thought could both bring Him glory and make things easier on me.

Anyway, that's what the Lord's been showing me this week-- that ultimately, I need to know Him better, listen more and commit myself to Him-- regardless of personal loss or gain.